Tuesday, 7 February 2012

Am I Sub or Slave?

Sub vs Slave, It is an age old argument, one that has been going on for generations, one there will never be a right or wrong answer for.
So am I a sub or a slave? I have always identified as a sub, mainly because of what I had read/heard/seen about/of slaves. However the more I learn about this life I choose to lead, the more I learn about myself, I have come to the conclusion that I am a little of both, more submissive than slave however.
The question/statement/task was ... How can you determine if you're a submissive or a slave? Have a think about submissive and slave as your inner self that has no association to BDSM. Food for thought really.
So I thought about it, not long and not hard, because lately it seems to be all I do think about. Just recently I have been looking at myself in the mirror trying to work out if I really am a sub or if it is just another "fad" (for want of a better word). I have been examining my inner self, trying to work out exactly where I fit in.
Submissive/slave/masochist/Dominant/Master/Sadist etc etc etc, now they are all just labels. So back to the original reason for this post. Think about submissive and slave as your inner self that has no association to BDSM.
I have thought long and hard about why I am what I am. I was sub/slave long before I new what the labels were. I have from a very early age, as long as I can remember, been a submissive/slave. It isn't something I woke up with one day. I have always, even as a child sought someone to take control, someone to guide me, someone to please, someone to serve. More so when I became interested in boys and started dating in my teens.
I still don't know why I am what I am, it is just who I am. Just as someone has a dominant personality, I have a submissive personality.
Even away from BDSM I have the desire to please, to serve, to obey, to be controlled (to a point and with negotiation), to be guided, to be nurtured, to be taught to be all I can be as a person.
And once again, I will more than likely edited this as I think of more.

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